Posts tagged stinking thinking

Serenity Meltdown in Virginia

Darrell Robertson, an AA in Virginia, seems to have a bit of a temper:

RUSTBURG — A Campbell County man who went on a rampage in April 2009, burning down his sister’s home, then breaking into an ex-girlfriend’s home and beating her with a shotgun, was sentenced in circuit court Friday to 13 years in prison. Assistant Commonwealth’s Attorney Beth Doucette called 40-year-old Darrell Robertson “an extreme danger to the community,” and noted he had previously knocked out his own mother’s front teeth in a fight and threatened to burn down her home, too. According to testimony in an earlier hearing, Robertson came to his sister’s home on Bear Creek Road on April 13 from an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting with a bottle of vodka, “dead drunk,” Doucette said. Robertson punched his sister in the mouth. When she left, he burned down her home.

This was the second time this jackass has gone into a serenity meltdown. The first time he received a suspended sentence, no doubt because he started going to AA and turned his life around. Now he can attend meetings behind, but he’ll almost certainly be back in the rooms when he gets out.

Keep Coming Back!

Campbell County man sentenced for beating, arson

Quote of the Day

“It has been my experience that those who bash the proven success of AA, have at some time or another tried the program and failed due to lack of honesty about themselves and failed to follow the suggestions of the program. This leaves them bitter and provoked to bash the program itself. Since the early 1930’s hundreds of thousands of people all over the world have succeeded in being delivered from their drinking problem.”

– “cah” Commenting on criticism of AA in the comment section of an AA puff piece.

Quote of the Day

“Oh, and your friend… who shared the amend letter with you? Don’t leave her at your back with anything like a knife in her hand.

Her sharing the sacred amend with you is her problem. The guy who made the amend, he’s forgiven…even though he was making amends to a snake who is not worthy to receive it.

He’ll go on and be fine, sober and free. Meanwhile, your mealy mouthy whore friend can live with the unforgiven amend till she croaks. You ought to go throw a resentment pity party for her… and bring her some good Scotch.”

Forgiveness is a fucking gift and an opportunity.”
McGowdog, an AA, commenting on someone who felt uncomfortable about receiving an amends letter from a past acquaintance.

Shutting the Doors to the Granfalloony Bin in Akron

A “sobriety club” in Akron is closing its doors because it is in debt, and about to be foreclosed upon by the bank. The “Today Club II”, which is operated by a group called “Sobriety Checkpoint, Inc.”, just held its last shindig. I like this quote from the article:

Regulars at the club say miracles happen inside the building where 15 Alcoholics Anonymous meetings are held each week.

Why is it that God™ is so selective about dishing out miracles? I mean, God™ can miraculously sober up 5% of the Today Club’s regulars, but He can’t at least provide a little cash to help them make their mortgage payments on time. It seems like He would arrange something like a lottery winning, or at least an understanding banker. This baffles me just a little, but of course, I’m not God™.

It’s last call at sobriety cafe in North Akron

Stinking Thinking

A recovering alcoholic in AA has to be vigilant or risk relapse (That makes me wonder why they use the term “recovering” at all, as “recovery” is the logical conclusion of the process, but, in AA, the word has no logical conclusion; perhaps “remission” might be more honest?), and the first sign that one is headed “out” is Stinkin’ Thinkin’ or Stinkin’ Drinkin’ Thinkin’. Nip that in the bud.

In 1985, Gayle Rosellini published a 24-page tract through Hazelden called Stinking Thinking, in which she says, “Attitudes are either a path to healthy and happy recovery or the road to relapse. It’s that simple.” And she goes on to say,

Unfortunately, those of us who are recovering from chemical dependency too often suffer from what A.A. members call stinking thinking. Stinking thinking is a bad attitude. It’s being negative, blaming, and chronically dissatisfied. And it’s sneaky. […] Stinking thinking is a major symptom of chemical dependency. We all suffer from it at one time or another and it doesn’t go away with thirty days of treatment. It can dog our heels even when we’re sober – wrecking our recovery.

Since Rosellini published her tract, the telltale signs of Stinking Thinking have evolved beyond the four types she proposed, and the definition has become both more broad and more specific and detailed. Broadly, stinking thinking is explained well in this 12-Step Workshop handout:

Without the meetings and the fellowship, I’ll begin to think that the problem is anything other than Powerless. And, I’ll forget what the solution is… the 12 Steps… and come up with all sorts of solutions of my own. In A.A., we call that “stinking thinking” and as alcoholics, we cannot afford the luxury of “stinking thinking” because stinking thinking produces “stinking results.”

This highlights the kernel of stinking thinking, which is, essentially, any deviation from the program – and, while deviation might be the result of one’s own dumdum justifications for going back to drinking, it could also generate from one’s utter dissatisfaction with the program for any number of logical and sound reasons.

And, to get more specific and detailed: “The Top Ten Types of Stinking Thinking” adapted from David D. Burns’ book, The Feeling Good Handbook, seems to have become the go-to list on many AA websites and blogs. This is a definitive list of distortions in thinking, which make a lot of sense. Because they make sense, it seems Continue reading Stinking Thinking