AddictionAAry

AA: It Doesn’t Mean What You Think It Means

AA has so many different definitions for common, everyday words, we thought that it would be useful to create reference page with commonly used words, and words for people and situations within AA for which there is not really a definition (contributor’s name is in parentheses):

AAnglish – the unique, slogan-filled, often contradictory  language of Alcoholics Anonymous (Commonsense)

AAnguish – the distress an AA feels when someone points out their contradictions, selective history and ineffectiveness. Characterized by serenity ranting and personal attacks against the person causing the aanguish.

AAWS – legal name for publishing wing of Alcoholics Anonymous that seems to exist solely for the purposes of: A) litigating against impoverished AA adherents in countries outside the U.S.; and B) putting its foot in its mouth in print, then remaining silent on all issues that might directly concern it & its tendency to put its foot in its mouth. (Speedy)

A.A. Alfie – (aka, “Hallo Alfie”) – a troll of this blog. Known as “The Iron Man of AA,” for his unusual stamina in maintaining his ability to rationalize, lie, gaslight, slander and preach the virtues of AA for an entire year in a thread at the JREF forums. (see Alfieholics Anonymous)

Abuse Excuse – using alcohol abuse as an excuse for immoral or unethical behavior.

Al-Anon – auxiliary organization of family and friends (predominantly women) whose lack of spiritual enlightenment causes the alcoholic to drink, lose jobs, chase women, smoke and drink coffee. (Lucy)

Alcoholism – 1) a disease caused by a spiritual deficiency; 2) a symptom of inherent character flaws.

Alfieholics Anonymous – a tripped-out, bizarro version of AA; as dreamed up in the deluded mind of A.A. Alfie. (see A.A. Alfie)

Amends – 1) a quid pro quo set up by an AA’s higher power™, where as a condition of sobriety, the AA is forced to apologize to an often unwilling third party who either does not remember, or wants nothing to do with, the AA. It is often followed by another amends for freaking the unwilling third party out, and a third amends for holding a resentment against them for the embarrassment caused by the first amends; and concluded by telling the unwilling third party that it is their problem for not accepting the forced apology. 2) an insincere, forced apology. Like a kid being pulled by the ear by his teacher, to apologize to another kid for pushing them on the playground. 3) an AA bringing people back into their life whom he/she has fucked over, who likely wants nothing to do with him/her, and using them as an emotional tampon in their quest for spirituality.

Angry Person – Someone who questions the AA dogma.

Anonymity – a cornerstone of the AA program, which is steadfastly protected, unless breaking it will serve a greater purpose for an individual AA, or AA as a whole – in which case it is dropped like a bad habit.

Ass Hole – The hole dug for Bill Wilson’s grave.

“Attraction, not Promotion” – from tradition 11, the steadfast rule that AA does not promote itself – and tools AA uses to recruit membership, such as television and radio advertisements, forced attendance from the court, as a means of “aftercare” for patients who have been indoctrinated into the 12-step program from “two-hatters” who are employees of treatment facilities with whom AA has a symbiotic relationship, recruiting by members “carrying the message” directly into prisons, and participating in interventions – are not promotion, but are really attraction. Really. (See two-hatters and “carrying the message”)

Bang ‘er and Mash – The act of 13th Stepping a new member, typically male on female – then telling her to look at her part, and boasting to the others members what a whore she is. See thirteenth-stepping.

Belladonna – a spiritual awakening accelerant. Used by Bill Wilson when he had his ‘white light’ encounter with God.

Bennison, Daniel (aka, “Diablo”; aka, “Quagmire”) – resident troll of this blog; subject of the e-book A Life Gone Awry, about his abuse of residents of Elan School.  Currently a resident of La La Land.

Big Book – Commonly used name of the AA bible, Alcoholics Anonymous.

Biggest Asshole Contest – an argument between two or more AAs who want to demonstrate how recovered they are, over which one of them had the worst drinking problem.

Billbal Thumper – An AA who quotes the the words of Bill Wilson, as though he were Jesus or Allah. See Dr. Bobblehead.

Billshit – Rants from the 12 x 12 or the ‘Big Book’; 2) anything quoted from the mouth of Bill Wilson. (btnben)

Birthday -  anniversary of an AA’s quit date, but only for time in which they have been in AA, as outside sobriety is not “real sobriety”.

Bock, Jim – part-time cyber stalker, asshole irrigator, disciple of Clancy Imislund and batshit-crazy leader of the Sponsorship Group of Chatham, New Jersey; who threatened the creators of this Stinkin’ Thinkin‘ blog. (see Imislund, Clancy)

Boniface – 8th century monk whose manifested spirit dictated the book Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions to Bill Wilson.

Buchman, Frank – Founder and leader of The Oxford Group. See Oxford Group.

“Carrying the Message” – From step twelve, the practice of recruiting others into AA by use of manipulative and deceptive recruiting practices.

Cheever, Susan — far less distinguished daughter of American fiction writer John Cheever who (on occasion) displays a certain degree of syntactical adequacy while shamelessly shilling for AA, Bill Wilson (see — Wilson, Bill), & the anthropomorphizing of alcohol abuse / addiction. (Speedy)

Circular Logicstics – the practice of an AA navigating his/her way around the the ‘Big Book’, while still maintaining the required level of cognitive dissonance.

Codependency – a relationship addiction dreamed up by the 12-step recovery industry, commonly held by someone who has a loved one who is addicted to drugs and alcohol; 2) the pathological caring for another individual. Most Al-Anon members are codependent.

ConSTEPated
– An AA member who is constantly plugged-up with [bull] shit. (Special Ed)

“contempt prior to investigation” – often used term by AAs to warn those who have heard, or who on the surface see some scary things about AA, that one should not judge AA before giving it a try. This only applies to how people should view AA, and not how AAs view everything outside of the organization. The term is wrongly attributed to a quote from Herbert Spencer in the “An Artist’s Concept” portion of the ‘Big Book’.

Controller – a non-alcoholic who tries to encourage the alcoholic in their life to stop drinking or to cut down (See enabler) (humanspirit)

Cross-talk – speaking out of turn, interrupting someone while they are speaking or giving direct advice to someone in a meeting. See “cross” talk.

“Cross” talk – the tacitly implied language among everyone in AA that the AA God™  is really the Christian god . See cross-talk.

Denial – a symptom of alcoholism. Because alcoholism is a “disease that tells me I don’t have a disease,” one of the symptoms is denial.

Diabaloney – any words uttered from our resident troll, Diablo (aka, Danny Bennison); 2) bullshit (See Rigorous Honesty)

Dick Head – an AA who selectively cites research from Dick B, an AA historian and friend of Stinkin’ Thinkin’, and disregards any and all negative history of Alcoholics Anonymous. (See Dick Burns)

Dick Burns – an affliction one gets from screwing people too often; 2) a religious nutjob and AA historian, aka Dick B, who writes a charitable, not always accurate, selective history of AA. (See Dick Head)

Dr. Bobblehead – An AA fundamentalist who primarily follows the words and teachings of “Dr Bob” Smith. See Billbal Thumper.

Drunkalogaholic – A person who replaces their addiction for alcohol, with an addiction to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Dry Drunk -  A pejorative, used to describe an alcoholic who got sober without using the steps, and without AA. Meant to imply that a person’s state of sobriety is tenuous, and used as a shutdown mechanism – typically along with accusations that a person is angry – against anyone who questions the AA dogma.

Duplipreachous – duplicitous preaching, as in telling someone “I don’t speak for AA”, and turning around beginning the next sentence to say exactly what AA thinks on a subject; or, manipulating a “pigeon” with lies by omission. (See pigeon)

Enabler – 1) anyone who does not immediately cut off all relations with a person who develops an addiction problem, even when they sure as hell don’t need any enabling from anyone; 2) a non-alcoholic who has doubts about the efficacy of the 12-step program. (humanspirit)

“Everything happens for a reason” – a phrase meaning all events are deterministic, not probabilistic. Thus, random chance does not exist and profits to a casino from gaming are the result of magic. Similarly, actuarial tables are of no real value to the life insurance industry. (Commonsense)

“fake it ’til you make it” – often used slogan, meaning that a person should pretend to believe the AA dogma, until they are fully brainwashed and indoctrinated.

Fourteenth-stepping – the act of talking a person out of continuing their participation in AA; 2) de-programming a person who has been brainwashed by AA. (see Zero-stepping) (Martha)

Glock, Lance – a convicted sexual deviant, and a 13th-stepper who runs the Johnson Sober Living House in Covina, California.

God™ – an omnipotent and omniscient being who has a fetish for keeping alcoholics sober for twenty-four hour stretches; but who did not care about them before they attended AA, and will drop them if they stop working the 12-steps. See higher power.

Godbotting – quoting the ‘Big Book’ of AA to settle arguments or disputes, as though it is infallible holy scripture.

Godpuppettry – the act of speaking for God, as though He were a sock puppet, and explaining how He intervened in your life to save you from alcoholic despair.

Granfalloonacy – creating a closed society of nutjobs who think they have a shared purpose of sobriety that no outsiders understand, but whose association is nothing more than a crazy religion.

Granfalloonatic – an AA who has bought into the dogma.

Greeter – the initiator of the love bombing process. A greeter welcomes all newcomers, much like that annoying person who stands at the entrance of Wal-Mart. Assigning a person “greeter” has an additional purpose making the greeter feel as though they are an important part of the group, which solidifies their emotional attachment to AA. (See Love Bombing).

Grimreapaphobia – the fear among AAs that they will die if they leave AA.

Grinnace – a cross between a grin and a grimace; the forced smile one gets when listening to old-timer John’s rambling drunkalog for the five-hundredth time, or the mindless uttering and advice from a ‘Big Book’ thumping sponsor, or the incessant chants and slogans heard in and around meetings.

Group of Drunks (G.O.D.) – a proxy god for one to use until he/she is fully indoctrinated into believing in the AA God™. A person who questions the existence of a Higher Power™, is led to accept the AA group (group of drunks) itself as a god, once they admit their powerlessness. (See God™)

Higher Power – God™, or a proxy god such as a tree or a doorknob. (see God™)

Humility – an arrogant refusal to believe that anyone who questions stepper dogma might just have a point; assumption of the right to shout down people who disagree with you; boastfulness about your length of sobriety and spirituality; insufferable attitude of smugness and superiority, esp towards newcomers. (humanspirit)

Huxley, Aldous — writer, philosopher, thinker of high regard who almost certainly obtained LSD from the same source as Bill Wilson (see — Wilson, Bill) but almost certainly had little — if any — contact with him (often quoted as labeling Wilson “one of the greatest social architects of the 20th century” without a shred of evidence supporting the validity of said quotation by Susan Cheever [see Cheever, Susan above] & AAWS [ibid]. (Speedy)

Imislund, Clancy – leader of California’s The Pacific Group. (see Pacific Group)

Insanity – doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. This applies to everything except failed AA and 12-step treatment, in which case you need to “keep coming back.”

“It’s Free” – often used argument that the fact that AA charges no membership fees makes it a valid program.

“It was meant to happen” – post hoc explanation of God’s logic, often heard in AA share sessions, on why He would allow such things as a DUI arrest or a death, to happen. (see Godpuppettry) (AndyM)

Kook Factor – the subjective degree of an AA’s craziness, as measured in such things as slogans, ad hominem attacks and delusion.

Lester, Greg – aka, “Truthseeker”, is a sometimes sober, occasionally meth-addled  AA and attorney from Asuza, California; defense attorney for Lance Glock, and infrequent contributor the comment section of this blog. (See Glock, Lance)

“Living life on life’s terms” – a phrase meaning one should spend the greater part of each day in either AA meetings or AA service work instead of unproductive activities such as family, work or school. (Commonsense)

Lohanonymity – the type of anonymity practiced by celebrities such as Lindsay Lohan and Charlie Sheen, who publicize their affiliation with AA in order to manipulate public opinion, typically after a public meltdown or indiscretion, and before being sentenced by a judge.

Love Bombing – a deliberate showering of affection and attention toward a new person in AA. A common tactic among cults for lowering the defenses of prospective member. (See Pigeon)

Meditation – a technique to rid the mind of any individual thought or rational thinking. (See Prayer)

Mondotuna – aka, “JD”; aka, “cableguy”; aka, “Mr Guestperson.” An internet troll and former moderator of the Lifering forum, Mondotuna is a closet AA who uses alternate names to slander individuals and forms of recovery other than AA.

Moral Re-Armament (MRA) – revised name of The Oxford Group. See The Oxford Group.

(the) most important person in the room” – term for which AAs refer to a person attending their first AA meeting. (See Pigeon)

“my experience” – term used by AAs as an excuse to not comment, and to turn a blind-eye, on the abuse and manipulation that takes place within AA — as in, “all I can tell you is my experience”; a common technique AAs use to pretend what happens in AA does not happen.

Ninety-day Wonder – a pejorative used by old-timers to describe a new AA member who has swallowed the AA  kool-aid, thinks he/she knows everything, and will not shut up.

Ninety in Ninety – the suggestion (see suggestion) that a person go to ninety meeting in their first ninety days, in which time a person is indoctrinated and brainwashed.

Normie – a pejorative used to denote those who are not alcoholics, including those who quit on their own, because they are not real alcoholics. Used as a way creating special society of AA members. (See Real Alcoholic) (ezez)

“not properly working the program” – the excuse used by AAs for the 95% of members who go back to drinking. (See Spontaneous Remission)

One Stepper – A person who quits drinking, but does not work the 12-steps. (See Dry Drunk)

Open Mindedness – believing without question everything told to you within AA about AA, addiction and human psychology; while completely dismissing any outside opinion or information. Newly recruited members are encouraged to look at AA with “an open mind.”

Orange – aka, “Agent Orange”, is the writer, researcher and publisher of the online book “The Orange Papers“. A person who lets facts and historical accuracy get in the way of what AAs know is really the truth. 2) da Debil

“Out There” – The world of constant fear and danger that exists outside the rooms of AA. Anyone who goes “back out there” is assumed to have returned to destructive drinking and faces certain death unless they return to the rooms in a suitably chastened and penitent state. (AndyM)

(The) Oxford Group – a cult-like Christan movement founded by Frank Buchman, from which AA and the 12-step movement is derived. See Buchman, Frank.

(The) Pacific Group – among the largest and craziest of AA groups, where the deluded followers learn from the teachings of their guru Clancy I. (see Imislund, Clancy; Bock, Jim)

Personal Inventory – a listing of a person’s weaknesses and character flaws. Unlike a normal inventory, which includes both credits and liabilities, the AA inventory only lists an individual’s faults. It is part of the programming process, and is used to humble, degrade and tear a person down.

Pigeon – often used slang term sponsors use to to refer to newcomers and their sponsees.

Prayer – a way of telling God™ that the shortcomings He imposed on you as part of His divine plan, are getting in the way of your sobriety, and you would like Him to remove them ASAP. (see Meditation)

Preddictionation – the divine foreordaining of a person’s alcohol addiction; the belief alcoholics are born that way.

Program Parrot – an AA who cannot think on his/her own, and simply regurgitates what  they hear in from other AAs.

Prospect – a potential AA who targeted and recruited into the group. (See Pigeon)

“Pulling a Dick” – colloquialism used to describe an act of plagiarism, securities fraud, infidelity, hallucinogenic drug use, channeling ghosts with a ouija board, or any of the other stunts routinely done by Bill Wilson.

Pump and Dump – 1) a form of stock fraud that was practiced by AA founder, Bill Wilson; 2) a type of 13th-stepping (See Stockbroker and Thirteenth-stepping)

Rarely – 95% of the time. An adverb recited from the ‘Big Book’ at the beginning of every meeting: “”RARELY have we seen a person fail, who has thoroughly followed our path.” Used to give the illusion of the program’s effectiveness, when actual statistics show more than nine out of ten people fail.

Recovering – term used to denote a person in the AA program. It’s used in present tense, as someone who enters into treatment will always be in recovery. A loaded word which helps the stepper understand that there is no exit strategy, and once one is an alcoholic, they always will be; and if they don’t continue with the program, they will wind up in jail, an institution, or dead.

‘Real’ Alcoholic – A person who can only get sober in AA. See Dry drunk.

Religious – spiritual. (See Spiritual)

Rigorous Honesty – 1) dishonesty and manipulation; 2) telling a lie with your fingers crossed; 3) habitual lying. (See Truthiness)

Serenity – the consequence of repressing natural human feelings and emotions, such as anger; 2) a delusional feeling of well-being.

Serenity Hornet – an AA who gets angry at anyone who questions or mocks AA dogma, or who points out the lack of effectiveness in AA and 12-step programs. (See Serenity Rant)

Serenity Rant – a raging lecture and/or tantrum by an AA when a person questions the dogma; typically peppered with accusations of resentment and anger toward the person to whom the rant is directed.

Shaming Ritual – receiving a shiny new “24-hour chip” in front of the rest of an AA group. Occurs when a person drinks after a long-term period of sobriety. Regardless of how much they drank, or of how long they had remained sober before, their sobriety date begins again at day one. Upon receipt of the chip, the shamed individual is told to go back and work the steps again, only with more honesty.

Sheenglish – a special dialect used by former 12-stepper Charlie Sheen. (Tracy Rigdon)

Silkworthless – the opinion in AA of any advancement in medical research and treatment, because it deviates from “The Doctor’s Opinion” in the ‘Big Book’.

Simple Program – a highly complicated set of ideas that requires a massive effort of intellectual contortion to accept. (humanspirit)

Slogabosity – the excessive use of AA slogans.

Sobriety – not just abstinence from drinking, but “a special state of Grace gained by working the Steps and maintaining absolute abstinence. It is characterized by feelings of Serenity and Gratitude. It is a state of living according to God’s will, not one’s own. It is sanity.” -from Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.

“Some must die so that others may live” – a phrase meaning it is good that some people drink themselves to death, as this helps scare the shit out of those considering leaving AA. (Commonsense)

“Some people’s brain needs a good washing” – a shutdown slogan used by AAs when a newcomer points out the brainwashing techniques of AA.

Spiritual – religious. (See Religious)

Spiritual Awakening – the process of ridding oneself of all rational thought; 2) a really good belladonna trip (also works with mushrooms, angel dust and acid).

(The) Sponsorship Group – whacked out  AA fundie group in Chatham, New Jersey; let by their even more whacked out guru, Jim Bock. (see Bock, Jim)

Spontaneous Remission Rate – the rate at which a person suffering from a disease will go into remission. The rate for alcoholism is approximately 5%, which happens to be (almost) the rate of remission for those who belong to AA. AA takes full credit for these cases as proof of its effectiveness, and discounts the remaining 95% by saying they do not properly work the program. (See “not properly working the program”)

(The) Spook Room – The room at Bill Wilson’s home where he and Lois set up a ouija board, and communicated with the spirit world.

Steptomaniac – People who are so insulated that when they try to engage anyone outside of AA, their lack of perspective forces them to unselfconsciously say shit. They say shit that only the truly brainwashed can understand; 2) People who have no idea how they sound to sober, critical thinkers. (Tracy Rigdon)

“stick with the winners” – AA slogan given to newcomers as advice on who to avoid in AA, with a “winner” being a person who has suspended his/her disbelief, and no longer questions the absurdity of the program. It helps in the not thinking process.

Stinkin’ Thinkin’; also, Stinking Thinking – 1) thinking; 2) a keen insight into the obvious; 3) any reasonable question of the AA dogma; 4) a blog.

Stockbroker – a huckster who was never licensed to sell stocks, never bought or sold a stock, never had a client, and was never an employee of a member of a stock exchange or any securities firm.

Suggestion – a piece of advice, typically given by an old-timer or an AA’s sponsor, framed as a false dichotomy – as in, “unless you want to  die of drinking, I suggest you do what I say.”

Step Child – a person who grew up around a 12-step program, and has been brainwashed from birth to believe the dogma; 2) the product of thirteenth-stepping.

Steptitude – a mental state involving beliefs and feelings toward the teachings of AA. A person whose life is governed primarily by the ‘Big Book’ and his/her AA group, and who often preaches but rarely questions the dogma, is considered to have a high degree of steptitude.

Surrender – the relinquishment of your own thoughts, beliefs, values, goals, desires, ideas, self, and life to “The Program”. (msrobinmm)

Thatcher, Ebby – Bill Wilson’s mentor, commonly referred to as “Bill Wilson’s Sponsor”.  Ebby helped lead Bill W to the same spiritual awakening that had sobered him up, before he subsequently drank himself to death.

Thirteenth-Stepping – The act of seducing new and vulnerable members of AA with manipulation and abuse of trust.

Tool’s Box – Helen Wynn’s vagina. See Wynn, Helen.

Toole, Michael – thief, former federal judge, and member of AA who used his membership in the fellowship as a reason to reduce his sentence, after pleading guilty to taking bribes and evading his taxes.

“too smart for the program” – a shutdown phrase for those who question the illogic or contradictions of AA. Derived from the slogan, “none are too dumb dumb for the program, but some are too smart.” There are variations of the slogan like, “well, you’re too smart for me” or “I thought I knew everything, too.”

“trust me” – “fuck you”

Truthiness – 1) truth that comes from the gut, not books; 2) the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true. (See Rigorous Honesty)

Twelve Traditions – the guidelines which AA and all AA groups follow, unless it is inconvenient or not in their best interest, in which case they are blatantly ignored.

Two-hatter – An AA who also plays the role of a therapist or social worker, and uses his or her position to manipulate others into AA, and into believing the AA dogma; regardless of the fact this is blatant conflict of interest, and goes against AA’s own traditions. (see Twelve Traditions).

Up With People – the second craziest group to be spun off from The Oxford Group; a cult-like singing troupe of young, right-wing fundamentalists.

White-light Experience -  Bill Wilson’s drug-induced, hallucinating encounter with God™, from which an entire spiritual recovery movement is based. (See Belladonna)

Wilson, Bill – founder of Alcoholics Anonymous

Wilson, Lois – Bill Wilson’s wife.

Wynn, Helen – (One of) Bill Wilson’s mistress(es), for who he left 10% of his estate.

X-Stepper – a person who has found their way out AA.

Zero-stepping – the act of talking someone out of going to AA in the first place. (see Fourteenth-stepping) (Martha)

  • LUCY

    Al-Anon – Auxilliary organization of family and friends (predominantly women) whose lack of spiritual enlightenment causes the alcoholic to drink, lose jobs, chase women, smoke and drink coffee.

  • jasoncb123

    Normal – What every other person in the world is, and that you are not, because of your "disease" to want to consume alcohol.

  • http://none violet

    @ stockbroker–hahahaha. i love this unaa life. and to think, at first, i thought leaving aa was in fact my disease–which , as you know had been doing push-ups bal blah blah–trying "to get me." i thought at least a tenny bit you all were in your disease. man. if you are in fact in your disease, well, then thank you. i love this outta aa and into the night life of mine right now. a lot.

  • speedy0314

    AAWS – legal name for publishing wing of Alcoholics Anonymous that seems to exist solely for the purposes of: A) litigating against impoverished AA adherents in countries outside the U.S.; and B) putting its foot in its mouth in print, then remaining silent on all issues that might directly concern it & its tendency to put its foot in its mouth.

    Cheever, Susan — far less distinguished daughter of American fiction writer John Cheever who (on occasion) displays a certain degree of syntactical adequacy while shamelessly shilling for AA, Bill Wilson (see — Wilson, Bill), & the anthropomorphizing of alcohol abuse / addiction.

    Huxley, Aldous — writer, philosopher, thinker of high regard who almost certainly obtained LSD from the same source as Bill Wilson (see — Wilson, Bill) but almost certainly had little — if any — contact with him (often quoted as labeling Wilson "one of the greatest social architects of the 20th century" without a shred of evidence supporting the validity of said quotation by Susan Cheever [see Cheever, Susan above] & AAWS [ibid].

  • joedrywall

    I attended a Big Book study once(with Joe and Charlie tapes) and I had a disagreement with a thumper(should I say a Tom Cruise of AA) over whether or not Ebby actually drank himself to death. After reading More Revealed by Ken Ragge you would believe Ebby T. did die drunk, however AA says that he relapsed and Bill basically babysat him until he died.

    Like I stated before in another post I drop in to find out what is true and what is not true. It is obvious that AA does lie about much of its history.

  • SoberPJ

    @ Joe..Orange has some good perspective on Ebby http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-letters10.htm… Ebby is a slight embarrassment to the cause. If he was Bill's sponsor and the program was so great, why couldn't he stay sober? Also, I keep wondering why the program doesn't start with newcomers downing a nice big swig of the Belladona cure and keeping that up for three days or so. That is what Bill did, right? Worked for him, right? That procedure is a foundational piece of the folklore of the solution, so why isn't it part of the "program"? Step 1, trip your brains out while religious wingnuts pound on your psyche to affect religious conversion.

  • speedy0314

    @ SoberPJ:

    "… trip your brains out while religious wingnuts pound on your psyche to affect religious conversion."

    sounds good to me. where do i sign?

    speedy

  • AndyM

    "Out there":

    The world of constant fear and danger that exists outside the rooms of aa. Anyone who goes "back out there" is assumed to have returned to destructive drinking and faces certain death unless they return to the rooms in a suitably chastened and penitent state.

  • http://profacero.wordpress.com Z

    OMG, what a great list. And it's true — it's a granfalloon! (I like McDowmagoguery a lot, too.)

    Nice, nice, very nice;

    Nice, nice, very nice;

    Nice, nice, very nice–

    So many different people

    In the same device.

    http://faculty.cns.uni.edu/~wallingf/personal/bok

  • AndyM

    Love "Dick head" and "circular logistics".

  • Amy

    omg (if I may), I'm cracking up: "God™ – an omnipotent and omniscient being who has a fetish for keeping alcoholics sober for twenty-four hour stretches…" too funny.

  • humanspirit

    Here's some of mine from the original stepspeakers post. There are some other suggestions on there in the responses – "tough love" etc.

    Simple program = a highly complicated set of ideas that requires a massive effort of intellectual contortion to accept, not least in order to understand what all this nonsense has to do with stopping drinking

    Self also ego = refusal to blindly accept the rubbish that steppers tell you; rational thinking; refusal to accept that you’re anything but a useless pile of shit because you got addicted to a chemical substance

    Sobriety = going to 12-step meetings for life, or until you relapse, and becoming a true believer and evangelist

    Drunk (noun) also dry drunk = anyone who is not a true believer, whether they have stopped drinking or not; anyone who ever gets angry, esp. with stepper mindfuck

    Enabler = anyone who does not immediately cut off all relations with a person who develops an addiction problem, even when they sure as hell don’t need any enabling from anyone; a non-alcoholic who has doubts about the efficacy of the 12-step program

    Controller = a non-alcoholic who tries to encourage the alcoholic in their life to stop drinking or to cut down (see also enabler)

    Humility = an arrogant refusal to believe that anyone who questions stepper dogma might just have a point; assumption of the right to shout down people who disagree with you; boastfulness about your length of sobriety and spirituality; insufferable attitude of smugness and superiority, esp towards newcomers

    Suggestion = order (sometimes backed up with emotional blackmail or death threats)

  • nomoresteps

    Wow, I think I've finally found a place I can call home! I quit drinking because the pain associated with having to continue to subject myself to the hourly mind fuck was much greater than the relief I experienced when I drank!

    Great Stuff!

  • Z

    To add to the definition of rigorous honesty, this, from Lucy:

    "Rigorous honesty : an apocryphal anecdote (often recited in a hyperbolic and emotional manner) which justifies the behavior of the AA member in a situation which harms other people, places and things because, according to a predetermined narrative, such actions were part of God’s will in choosing him for redepemtion of his sin of drinking, selfishness and egomania."

  • DEZEZ

    wow so funny!!! i am so glad that there are people that dont take the one brand of sobriety being sold.. ive asked these questions for years and been told that "its this type of thinking that got you in trouble in the first place" well im sorry that i have an independent thought in my head!!! This is great stuff…

    ACCEPTANCE- commonly used by AAs to explain how spiritually fit they are by their ability to passively go about life "with acceptance being the answer to all their problems" and testify how they are ok with bending over and taking it where the sun shine

  • http://www.stinkin-thinkin.com friendthegirl

    howlermonkey, It is the most evil phrase. Trying to convince people that they can't trust themselves is a deliberate attempt to make them vulnerable to psychic abuse and manipulation.

  • AndyM

    "Denial" is another obvious candidate, isn't it? I found the following piece interesting:
    http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/2010/01/words-t

  • howlermonkey

    “Your best thinking got you here” is one of the most evil phrases in all of AA culture.

  • humanspirit

    @AndyM

    "Denial" is a really good one (but too late for me now to think up a good definition! Will try again tomorrow.)

    I think another obvious one that has been missed is the word "alcoholic". Have been spending a hard day at the (real) dictionary face ( lexicography's a dirty job, but someone has to do it) and reckon there would possibly be several senses, according to AA, which might go something along the lines of:

    1. Anyone who presents him- or herself at an AA meeting seeking help for a drink problem, however serious or minor. Example: "You wouldn't be here if you weren't an alcoholic."

    2. Anyone who stays in the 12-step program, however serious or minor their drink problem might have been originally, whether they have stopped drinking or may not ever have had an addiction to alcohol at all. Even if they haven't touched a drop for decades and have no desire to. (See also: powerlessness)

    3. Anyone who is 'working the steps' , whether they have an addiction to anything or not ( origin: From the AA belief that addiction to anything real is just a symptom of the spiritual disease of addiction, which everyone suffers from until they discover the 12 steps, even if they are teetotal), [Can't make any sense of this myself, but this is the kind of nonsense I've heard steppers say! Could be why even people in Al-anon have to declare that they are "powerless over alcohol"] See also: codependence.

    On the other hand (and this is where the dictionary should have a 'see also' or 'compare' cross-reference):

    "not an alcoholic" – Anyone, however serious and extreme their drink problem might have been, even if this led to completely fucking up their life and driving their body to the point of near death, who successfully manages to stop drinking without the 12-step program. Example: 'He was obviously not an alcoholic to start with.'

  • DeConstructor

    How about "diseasing" the whole family?

    Enabler and co-dependent-

    You bailed your kid out of jail! You have a progressive, terminal, and incurable "disease" of co-dependency.

  • Marko

    If ignorance is bliss, most of you must be in Heaven.

  • Marko

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    The amount of AA's listed above is just a fraction of the actual number of AA's whose lives have been saved and recreated thanks to the 12-Steps. Have a great day everyone!

  • Marko

    Bummer! the last post actually had a few hundred A's. This site won't censor ignorance but it will the truth???

  • http://www.stinkin-thinkin.com friendthegirl

    Seriously, Marko? For some reason, the system here couldn't fit all the "A"s you tried to post into your comment, and you think you're being censored?

    When I look at the comments from the dashboard, I can see that you just held down the "A" key for about 5 minutes. The system here can't handle that kind of crap, so it didn't show up. No one is censoring you. You can say whatever you want.

    (Holding down the A key isn't actually saying anything, by the way.)

  • ez

    The 'missing' A's most likely disappeared down the A-hole…

  • speedy0314

    @ ez:

    pure … comic … GENIUS!

    i want to have your brain babies,

    speedy

  • Gunthar2000

    AAsshole – Any AA member self-sworn to promote, protect, and defend the sacred doctrine of Alcoholics Anonymous.

  • Gunthar2000

    Hello Marko!… or should I call you Mr. Casey?

  • AndyM

    Controversy:

    Something into which the aa name must never be brought. Any legitimate grievance on the part of a member for which aa as a whole must dodge accountability.

  • jasoncb123

    havent looked at the definitions in awhile, glad to see their being updated…..was working out of town last week – probablly drank more then i should have but other then catching a buzz, that was about all that happened….not sure how i should feel about that, trying not to dwell on it, shit happens.

  • ez

    You can use the following quote in much the same manner as holding up a mirror to a Vampire.

    "from Kerr v. Farrey, 95 F.3d 472 (7th Cir. 1996) :

    "A straightforward reading of the twelve steps shows clearly that the steps are based on the monotheistic idea of a single God or Supreme Being. True, that God might be known as Allah to some, or YHWH to others, or the Holy Trinity to still others, but the twelve steps consistently refer to "God, as we understood Him." Even if we expanded the steps to include polytheistic ideals, or animistic philosophies, they are still fundamentally based on a religious concept of a Higher Power."

    It might also work like like tossing Holy water on a Vampire, Provokes screams, wailing and smoke.

  • Special Ed

    ConSTEPated–An AA member who is constantly plugged-up with shit.

  • Mona Lisa

    @SE: Ha! That one is great!!!!!

  • http://profacero.wordpress.com Z

    Hey. What is the meaning of "take reponsibility"? They say that a lot.

    As in

    Them: Where are you going?

    Me: To the fruit stand. I have a terrible cold, and I am going to cure it with fruit.

    Them: A terrible cold, hunh? Tsk, tsk. Well, I am afraid you are going to have to take responsibility for it! Did you ever consider doing THAT?

    I never understood what the phrase meant, what they were trying to accuse me of. But they were always very triumphant and stern and accusing. What is the deal?

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  • AndyM

    How about :

    Akronym- a whimsical and corny device whereby a word is arbitrarily assigned a new significance based on the notion that its initial letters could stand for otjher words (e.g. God= group of drunks)

    and

    Anakronism- treating a supposed disease as though it has a supernatural cause and solution in the 21st century

  • AndyM

    Z

    I don't know what "take resonsibility" means either, but I think you're supposed to keep your side of the street clean while you're doing it.

  • AndyM

    That was a propos of nothing by the way, just another random aa platitude, not a judgement on what you said!

  • John

    You know this is a money making scam! You want your T-Shirts to become some huge brand associated with drugs and drink. This might work over here in the U.K because we have some real thick private school girls from the typical middle classes people called filly and Izzy etc lol!

  • Morgan Pryds

    i asume you have another way for reaching soberness:)

  • Martha

    “Two-hatter – An AA who also plays the role of a therapist or social worker, and uses his or her position to manipulate others into AA, and into believing the AA dogma; regardless of the fact this is blatant conflict of interest, and goes against AA’s own traditions. (see Twelve Traditions).”

    Another species of two hatters are steppers who really have a degree in counseling and have a counseling practice. My ex sponsor was of this ilk and openly solicited for clients in AA. She was very skilled at manipulating people and gas lighting. I had a good therapist at the time, but the sponsor said that she specialized in “dual diagnosis” therapy and that a therapist who was not “working a good program” would hurt my own program. Using AA lingo (some are sicker than others) she told me that I was actually more depressed than I was and that a non AA therapist could not possibly pick up on that. I became aware that at least one of her sponssees who was also a client actually got worse because of this monster sponsor. I am so glad I never came under her spell.

  • http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/The-Real-Mans-Journal/189268777758900 Tracy Rigdon

    Wanted to share another definition; one that I submitted to urban dictionary, and they declined to publish! You think they have AAers on staff?

    Steptomaniac:
    1. Most of the members of Alcoholics Anonymous.
    2. Person who has traded their alcoholic lifestyle for the less-physically-demanding craziness and insanity of a cult program designed by a narcissist named William G. Wilson.
    3. A person who is led to accept the AA group (group of drunks) itself as a god, once they admit their powerlessness.
    4. People who are so insulated that when they try to engage anyone outside of AA, their lack of perspective forces them to unselfconsciously say shit. They say shit that only the truly brainwashed can understand.
    5. People who have no idea how they sound to sober, critical thinkers.
    6. Wack jobs who quote from the Big Book line and verse and sometimes even throw in the page number.
    7. People who say that they only feel normal while in meetings, and that when they are with “normies” they feel different or uncomfortable.
    8. Someone who tells the struggling newcomer that the struggle to reach sobriety is futile and that hitting rock bottom drunkenness is imminent, expected and normal. Unless of course you do exactly what he prescribes and only what he prescribes.

    *(Sometimes also referred to as a sponsor, although not all Steptomaniacs are sponsors.) Once miserable drunks, now saviors of mankind and pontificators of Truth!

  • http://www.stinkin-thinkin.com friendthegirl

    Tracy, I’m sorry it took so long to get your comment up! It’s been stuck in the spam filter all day!

  • causeandeffect

    Tracy Rigdon, that’s hilarious! These 2 are my favs:
    4. People who are so insulated that when they try to engage anyone outside of AA, their lack of perspective forces them to unselfconsciously say shit. They say shit that only the truly brainwashed can understand.
    5. People who have no idea how they sound to sober, critical thinkers.

    Add to more and send em to David Letterman!

  • http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Real-Mans-Journal/189268777758900 Tracy Rigdon

    …and now we have to add Sheenism and Sheenglish!

  • AndyM

    Steptomaniac has a ring to it.

  • chris

    “Behind The Steps”, could mean- NOT TRUTHFUL ENOUGH or AT ALL, to put before manipulating rhetoric.

  • chris

    AA= Absolutely Absurd

  • chris

    i wander Marko is still attending meetings, you seem alittle angry Marko, whats the matter man, you not feeling spiritual today. you must not be working the program right. poor marko.

  • Martha
  • chris

    the toilet flushes if you flush it, you die if you dont. the car door opens if you open it, you die if you dont. the fart smells if you smell it, you die if you dont.

  • yahoo

    The mind-fuck in those programs is depressing, no wonder most steppers/sinners are on anti-depressants. The lies in those rooms & the dogma of a manic-depressant conman/whack-job drives steppers insane. Being away from those meetings & dogma for a while I am regaining my thought-proccess & personality again. I still can’t believe the hold that crap had over me.

  • angelo

    thanks for your enlightening clarification. I was searching for some “support” after getting rid of a crazed “28 years wanna be sponsor” after he went off on me for interfering with his attempt to 13th step a new comer with just over 9 months. I got sober 5 years ago and just before the 5 year mark I began going back to meetings again and once again attempted to “toe the line”. I don’t know why I do this to myself. I was raised a JW, so I am pretty well adept at sniffing out cults. I picked a guy because I thought after hearing him in a meeting a few times that he was really doing well living sober and I might be able to learn a few things from him. After telling him to fuck off for attempting to use what I’ve shared with him in confidence as leverage when he knew he was wrong for trying to come on to this poor girl in my truck, (while we were helping her move out of her place just after breaking up with her boyfriend of 5 years) have realized that I never needed him in the first place. I have experienced spontaneous remission. I can attribute it to whatever I’d like-and that’s that.

  • http://www.stinkin-thinkin.com friendthegirl

    Hi angelo, Welcome!

    Yes, you’ll definitely find others here with similar experiences. If you haven’t already, check out the “Why I Left AA” link in the menubar.

  • Bus Bozo

    Angelo:
    Welcome. Many (most) of us here found the same to be true; the difference of how the good speakers sound and share, and then if the opportunity arises, seeing them in real life situations. Most often, quite a different side is revealed. Someone pointed out in another thread today about AA actors. The rise up the ladder in AA status seems directly related to how well someone shares, and of course the omnipresent TIME.

  • Darren

    I have started a facebook group to discuss these matters. Please join the discussion!

  • http://anonymousjr.keepandshare.com JR Harris

    Can you open up the facebook account so that it can be viewed before joining? It currently does not allow you to do that.

  • http://anonymousjr.keepandshare.com JR Harris

    Instructions on Facebook and privacy settings and what information is gathered at each level:

    https://www.facebook.com/help/?page=839&_fb_noscript=1

  • http://thelastchanceexaco.com Chris M

    I love you. You’re hilarious. I’m an active member of AA – but I’m a heretic and you’re funny.

  • causeandeffect

    Hi Chris! Welcome. I’m glad you’re enjoying the blog. It’s not easy being a heretic, is it.

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  • http://stop13stepinaa.wordpress.com Massive Attack

    yahoo – i agree with all the low self esteem building that goes on its a wonder more odnt kill themselves. Very sad and very serious really.
    Angelo- Welcome! Sounds like you ran into a true AA Nazi. I too left after many years in AA. I left 8 weeks ago …but who’s counting. I am :) I feel great. I feel free-er. With each week I can see some other aspect that makes AA actually dangerous, unhealthy, and mindfucking.

    Im glad you both found ST. I am curious what city you are in?

  • raysny

    “Attraction, not Promotion”

    As it was explained to me, those 60 second things on TV late at night aren’t advertisements, they’re public service messages designed to let the poor, suffering alcoholic know that AA is out there for him. He might have never heard of AA otherwise.

    • alissa mower clough

      As if they didn’t know through almost every other means. Do you really think that they a) never heard a celebrity talking 12-steps in the tabloids, b) didn’t ever see or hear of the “recovery chic” TV shows popular a few years ago, c) never saw a 12-step influenced movie, where the hero’s great moment is to say “I surrender”, d) never went to a shelter or soup kitchen, where AA brochures are available, or e) ever hear from anyone from a doctor to a friend-of-a-friend that AA was THE way out of their problem?

      TV spots are just billboards by another name.

  • Diloquius

    “Out There” Thanks for clearing that up. It always followed a phrase like:

    Go back “out there”
    If they don’t “make it back” they might die “out there”
    I went back “out there”
    They are back “out there”
    Don’t go “out there”
    Man, it’s windy as hell “out there”
    It’s raining hard “out there”

    Out WHERE?!

    (I was picturing a few people in a meeting room in a frantic panic. Hurrying to pull the door closed and locking the windows because of something bad that’s happening outside or “out there”. Maybe even closing curtains if there are any “in there”. Like maybe a hurricane or something.

    But outside on a busy city street the sun shines and life is going on. Children are playing and people are going about their daily routines. People are preparing for dinner and some have tuned into their TV shows after a good day’s work. Cars are honking and pedestrians are making their way busily up and down the streets as the sun now begins to set.)

    So the only impending doom is in their own brains.