Sexual Predator Sentenced to AA

Yeah, another one:

KEARNEY — A Ravenna man is serving a nine-month jail sentence for sexually assaulting his stepdaughter.

The man was also placed on three years probation on a second charge of felony attempted incest of the same girl. The man’s name is being withheld to protect the victim’s identify.

Under his probation, the man must complete intensive outpatient counseling, attend Alcoholic’s Anonymous/Narcotics Anonymous three times a week and obtain his GED. Judge John Icenogle sentenced the man last week in Buffalo County District Court.

The man pleaded no contest to the charges in July. Both incidents happened in October 2009 in Ravenna and involved the same girl.

Court records say the girl told her mother about the abuse, which occurred when the girl asked her stepfather for permission to do anything or go anywhere.

h/t Sally!

  • SoberPJ

    What do you want to bet that everyone of these we see represents a hundred we don’t see?

  • AnnaZed

    Yeah, like roaches.

  • Betty

    I was just thinking the same thing. What about the parents who bring their children to meetings with them? They must not realize that their is a good possibility that their children are in the same room as a sexual predator or two or three… No way anyone could be aware of this and still bring their kids. How easy would it be for one of them to befriend one of these parents and then gain quick access to their child? The automatic trust that many “in the rooms” seem to have for a fellow AA would make that scenario all too easy.
    Why is any of this ok? The more I read the sicker I feel.

  • SoberPJ

    Easy as , “will you be my sponsor?”

  • Sally

    Betty, per your question: “How easy would it be for one of them to befriend one of these parents and then gain quick access to their child?”

    You might want to check the following out. Caution, another upsetting topic.

    British woman held in US after ‘forcing daughter, 11, to be sex slave since age five’

    “The girl claimed her 40-year-old mother would bring men home from Alcoholics Anonymous meetings and let them rape her beginning when she was aged five.”

  • Betty

    I heard about that…beyond horrific but not beyond belief. What scares me more than the fact that this happens is the fact that I’m not surprised that it happens. I mean; of course it does! It is the perfect recipe for vile behavior when a group of anti-social predators are mixed with a group of folks taught to have blind faith in this program that teaches them not to ask questions. Just follow.

    How do I say to someone (thinking of a person I know who brings her child to meetings on a regular basis) that it might be a terrible idea to continue doing so? Guess I just have to take a deep breath and resolve not to worry what anyone thinks/says/feels about me after I broach the subject. Advice anyone on how to do so without coming off like a lunatic and invoking the wrath of the room?

  • SoberPJ

    Its a tough call Betty. Tell her you heard about a website that is trying to make AA safer and give her the url and call it good. It is a slippery slope though. You do risk social exclusion if she talks to her sponsor and blah, blah, blah.. you know how it goes.

  • Sally

    One time an entire meeting that I was at was dedicated to this topic. A man would bring his two little kids to the same friday meeting about twice a month. They were toddlers.

    I’d like to point out that the issue of safety concerning the children was never brought up… Discussed was only how the group couldn’t focus on thier rocovery if he continued to bring them, because they “made too much noise and disrupted the meeting”. This was an NA.

    The man actually cried and said the he wanted his kids to hear messages like “experience, strength, and hope”. It was a big dramatic production (I noiticed that no one could get “recovery” anyway because all they did was argue about how they couldn’t concentrate with the “brats” were running around).

    I was very new (I didn’t bring up safety either), but did offer to babysit for him. He was actually a nice guy. My sponsor spoke up and told me that I shouldn’t do that because then I would miss the meeting. Notice the greed and self centeredness with her intrusion, wrapped around suggesting what she thought was best for me.

    Betty, I would simple say that “I wouldn’t bring my kids to a meeting”. Hopefully she/he will asks why and you could nicely tell them the truth. Speak from the heart and hope they listen. You might want to direct them to some of these news articles.

    It’s not appropriate for a child to be hearing that kind of stuff anyway, in my opinion. But people generally don’t like being told how to parent regardless as to who is right or wrong. I would speak with “I” statements and appear bossy or seem opiniated, even if on the inside you want to scream and shake them into sense. Some people just don’t listen to those kind messages and get defensive.

  • Sally

    lol..I meant *not” appear bo opiniated

  • Betty

    Yeah- I’m not so worried about social exclusion really since I have stopped going to meetings and would end up going to a meeting just to talk to her. So that would be weird. I will give it some thought.

  • Betty

    omg! The same scenerio you just described actually happened concerning this very person and her child. A “group conscience” was held to determine whether the child in question should be allowed in the nice little closed meeting. Not because anyone was concerned for the child, but like you described, concerned for their own inability to concentrate or whatever. At the time, I was very new in AA and new to this particular meeting as well. The safety of the child never occured to me at all. I wish that it had.
    I did offer to babysit for her sometime later and was able to do so on a couple occassions. Talk about trusting…she hardly knew me and let me watch her small child at my home. When she offered to reciprocate, I thanked her but never took her up on the offer. And never would. Not because I have any weird feelings about her specifically ( she seems great…) but because I do not really know her and I can’t fathom leaving my children in the care of someone I met in AA.

  • Sally

    That is odd that this came up at one of your meetings too. Same thing, lol. All about the group – group conscience as you said. That’s all it ever seems to be about.

    I unfortunately wasn’t “allowed” to babysit on a meeting night per my sponsors strong suggestion. That turned out to be equivalent of any night of the week.

    If your still thinking about it, maybe give her a call. Or a text? Like “omg. i just heard about something” and share it with her. Odds are you won’t get her attention. Going there for that purpose alone doesn’t seem wise. You might get stuck in a trance and fall back into to AA’s grasp. Scary thought.